This uni session is finally over; praise that lord, wherever he may be (nowhere lol). The first nine weeks of this semester ate away at my very being, but I have come out the other side, not quite a new person; but perhaps an evolving one.
I had to take a poetry subject, and although it terrified me, it was also very therapeutic and surprisingly cathartic. I think I’ll share some of my poetry with the blogging world.
Firstly, here is a poem I wrote for a different subject. Not so much “wrote” actually, but the task required us to gather quotes and sayings from our immediate world, and construct them into a poem with a message that seemed quintessential of our time period. Here it is.
LOVE OF PAIN, AND VICE VERSA
I asked myself what I felt above all else,
I could think only of loss
of things forgotten though never known,
sacrificed though never held in hand.
Grief is better to keep inside—
working like bees or ants
building curious and perfect structures
Because maybe nothing is
an easy thing to feel,
but a difficult thing to express.
And maybe nothing is chaotic;
because chaos is more freedom;
in fact, total freedom. But no meaning.
I want to be free to act, and I also
Want my actions to mean something.
But sometimes when you have
To sacrifice something precious,
you’re not really losing it, you’re just
Passing it on to someone else.
That’s when you know you’re not alone,
When you know you’re in love.
You can no longer sleep
Because for once, reality
is finally better than your dreams.
They say you know when you know yourself,
You can only ever be yourself because everyone else is
To be yourself in a world that is
Constantly trying to make you
is the world’s greatest accomplishment—
It is better to be hated for what you are
than to be loved for what you are not.
Love looks not with the eyes,
but with the mind,
and therefore is winged
Cupid painted blind.
And let me ask you this—
Have you ever been in love?
Horrible isn’t it? It makes you so vulnerable.
It opens your chest
and it opens up your heart,
And it means that someone
can get inside you and mess you up.
You want to tell everyone and no one—
There is no greater agony than
Bearing an untold story inside you.
Reality continues to ruin
Our lives, but to really live
Is the rarest thing in the world.
Most people exist, that is all.
But there’s no use going back to yesterday,
Because I was a different person then.
I am still my own, I must remember
That I belong to nobody—
Til I look through the mist
And see the shape of you,
And I know. I know,
That I’m in love with you.
My body craves you,
And my soul,
Sadly, it’s the same thing.
Depression is the result
The mind creates problems
That didn’t even exist.
So, I hope you find someone
that knows how to love you
When you are sad.
Because the world is a mess,
And I want to laugh,
Because all I can thin
is how horrible,
And beautiful it is.